Free the Boobies!


It’s my day off and I am expecting a guy from an HVAC company to arrive later this morning to give us a quote on a new air conditioner and furnace set up. This means I have to be awake and dressed to the point of greeting a stranger in my home. This means I’m wearing a bra.


I generally don’t wear a bra when I’m home, hell, I don’t wear much of anything when I’m hot, especially when we have no A/C. (Oh yeah, our A/C died two weeks ago… good times.) One of the many reasons we bought our own place is so we could walk around buck nekkid if we felt like it.


Wearing garments I don’t have to on a day off is a bit of a drag, (get it?) but it’s not the end of the world. This morning though, the bra feels tight and irritating. Everything feels tight and irritating. It’s like my boobs know it’s a day off and they’re all like “WTF? Why are you doing this to us? It’s the bra’s day off too!” I realize I just anthropomorphized my boobs there. Wait, can I do that? Can I ascribe human attributes to something that is already by definition, a human attribute? Have I entered some kind of grammar inception?

To make a long story short, I have today off, I’m wearing a bra, and I don’t want to be wearing a bra. I also don’t feel like writing anymore, so that’s all for now.



Life Hacks

Many of us have little secrets and tips that get us through each day. Little things that help us be productive. Some call them Life Hacks.

I am applying two of favorite day off life hacks today. The first is to drive Ron to the train station. This forces me to get up BEFORE 7am (hell, before 9am) and be awake enough to drive, dressed and ready for the day.

The second is to strip the bed and wash the sheets. This prevents me from succumbing to the temptation to crawl back into bed for just a few more hours.

I have a third and that’s to not turn the computer on or I risk sitting in front of it all day. I am obviously not applying this one today.




I’ve been a terrible blogger. I’m not even sure why I do this anymore. I don’t think anyone reads this. This is not one of those blog posts that is really a thinly veiled cry for attention, I swear, I just really don’t think anyone reads this. I’ve been writing up stuff that’s happened in the last two months and I’ll be posting it here in the comings days to play catch up. We’ll see where it goes.

I’ve been thinking about either redoing this blog and giving it a facelift or giving it up altogether. I don’t know which way I’ll go yet. I enjoy blogging and I like the design of this particular template, but I think it’s time for something different. I’m not sure it’s worth the trouble though, y’know? If you read this or you know me, now is a good time to tell me what you think. Keep the blog? Ditch the blog? Keep it as it is? Redo the design? Get a haircut? Write in depth about film noir and its effect on Twinkies? Legs – shaved or un-shaved? Whatever.

Mammogram Mess


Back in May I had a routine mammogram. Then two days later I got a phone call to tell me they wanted to do a re-scan and an ultrasound of my right boob. I have no history of breast cancer in my family and re-scans are pretty common. I figured I’d pop down in a day or two and be done with it. Nope. the earliest appointment they had was a month out. Ooookay. No biggee right? Well, it turns out that the longer one has to wait for such a test, the more stressed one becomes thinking about it. I didn’t really understand how stressed I felt at the time until the damn thing was over and I got the all clear. Hooray! My boobs are not trying to kill me!

Then I get home to find a letter in my mailbox from the same medical facility I had literally just returned from stating I needed to have my left boob examined. WTF? It’s about 4:45 in the afternoon when I get home and I call the number on the letter to find out what the hell is going on. after navigating their phone menu and waiting on hold I get the billing office. They tell me to call my primary doctor. I call and they’ve all gone home for the day. I send them an email through their online portal and start to stew. The relief I felt earlier is now replaced by anger.

I started to wonder if this was a clerical error. Did they scan the correct boob? Was this letter even meant for me? IS there some poor woman out there somewhere who SHOULD have received this letter? Is this a scam to bill my insurance company for two visits? The more I thought about it the more frustrated  and angry I got, and there wasn’t anything I could do about it until the next morning. GAH!

So first thing the next morning I call and get my doctor on the phone. She assured me that the letter was not meant for me and that I was fine. She did say that she would like to see a copy of it though and could I fax or email it over? I live right down the street and told her I’d be there in five minutes so she could make a copy. I was there in three.

I still don’t know who that letter was for or why I got it, and due to confidentiality laws I probably never will. I just hope that whoever it was intended for gets the test they need and whoever made the error gets the re-training they need.