A Meandering Ramble Through My Mind

The last couple of weeks have been busy and stressful and weird and interesting. I don’t even know where to begin. The last time I posted I was blathering on about a broken camera. Let’s start there.

It turns out that my camera is just fine and it is the lens that is malfunctioning. I was able to confirm that this past weekend. As for the whole weird story behind that I am going to wait to blog about it until after part two of the saga, which should occur this coming weekend. Lets just say I learned an important lesson about confirming dates and writing the correct date on my calendar before waking up at the crack of dawn and making long drives to the middle of the state. Holyoke is a sad, sad place. If I were to film a horror movie about the end of the world, I would do it there.

I know, that’s pretty vague, but I woke up with a headache this morning and while I feel like writing, I feel like there’s a thousand other things I should be doing right now and the brightness of the screen is a tad irritating. And yet I am still here.

I forgot my phone yesterday. It felt weird. Not that many people try to get in touch with me that way, it felt oddly freeing, yet disconnected. Stranded even.

Back to my camera problems. The broken lens is nice enough, and frankly, expensive enough that it is worth cleaning/fixing/whatever it needs so I will look into doing that. I rented a camera last weekend thinking my camera was toast and I had fun playing with it. I’m trying to get back into taking photos with something besides my phone. That thing has been a curse and a blessing. Taking photos with my phone is fun. Taking photos with a “real camera” started to feel like a job, which sucks the fun out of it. Part of me wonders if photography was more fun when I had no idea what I was doing. I tend to get caught up in the technical details and lose focus, pun intended.

This rental camera has lit a spark in me and I am now considering buying a new camera. I’ve always been about the new shiny. Ron loves to research the shit out of things and he’s good at it so he’s been looking into things for me. I let him do the research because I usually hit a saturation point with information overload and when that happens I tend to shut down. You should see me in the salad dressing aisle at the supermarket. Too many damn choices.

I do wonder if I should try to use the tools I have at hand before investing in something new. If I am not using the equipment I have, will buying something new just end up collecting dust as well? Part of me wants something new to play with NOW, but the practical side of me says wait.  Play with the toys you have before looking at something new.  Get to know those old girls again and see what they are still capable of. There will always be something new to buy and there will always be a better version of whatever I have.

This is such a “first world problem” it’s not even funny. Or maybe it is funny? Perhaps I am obsessing over this camera thing so I don’t have to think about other things. In the grand scheme of things this isn’t very important at all. Or perhaps I am over thinking the fact that I am over thinking this? I still have a headache and I’m really starting to blather on so I’m going to step away from the screen now.



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